What is Sexuality?

Have you every tried to define sexuality? Go on – give it a go – it’s harder than you think (no pun intended!)

Sexuality is much more than ‘having a good romp’ (as my partner described it). It is about the internal drives and motivators that lead us to find certain people more attractive to us than others. That is about gender, chemical and personality attraction as well as physical appearance.

BUT… and there is a big ‘But’… sexuality usually comes with a huge amount of baggage. It is one of those areas you just don’t talk about in polite company. Perhaps that is one of the reasons why most of us have hang-ups about our sexuality. We have never really been allowed to talk about it openly. Let’s face it – we don’t even really know what it means!

For many of us, sex education left a lot to be desired. As teenagers, perhaps we muddled through as clumsily as with every other aspect of growing up and as adults – what we didn’t know by now we considered wasn’t worth knowing. And anyway, we certainly weren’t about to admit to any gap in knowledge in that department!

For women, that has often led to us being far less than fully satisfied. Let’s be honest now – how often have you adopted the ‘lie back and wait for it to be over’ attitude?

For others, the animal is long out of its cage and we have been struggling for years to tame its wild and unpredictable nature, with varying degrees of success.

Most of us – especially women – are pretty good at burdening ourselves with heavy loads of guilt about what happened to us in the past. Guilt can be hugely destructive, and usually serves no useful purpose whatsoever.

Sex is a beautiful and creative thing, which should and can be hugely enjoyable. Unfortunately, for many of us it is none of those things.

Alive, Free and Gorgeous is about helping us get in touch with our sexuality and recognise the barriers to full enjoyment – which are usually in our own heads – and which stop us enjoying being who we really want to be.

So go on ladies… let the animal out of its cage, at least for a little while. Get in touch with who you really are, and begin to feel alive, free and absolutely gorgeous.